The Divine Embrace

My life has been in a fairly disorganized mess for the last year and a half. I had been taking care of my mom for three years 200 miles away from my husband and my own home. When Mom passed away a year ago March I found myself scrambling to move back home before my husband and I headed out on a road trip vacation. While I lived away from home, I accumulated a whole lot of stuff. We started two businesses while I was living with Mom and everything for each of them was housed with me. Our home in the woods is not large and doesn't have a lot of storage space. I didn't do so well over the winter juggling the grieving process and organizing all that stuff back into our home. This summer it was definitely on the docket. Then my dad passed away. I have found myself having another season of grief and lack of motivation. There is much to do around our house and consequently there are treasures stored away in boxes still.

Which brings me to this post. I just found a wonderful book which I had forgotten about: The Divine Embrace, by Ken Gire. Besides the fact that I love anything by Ken Gire, the subtitle drew me in. "An invitation to the dance of intimacy with Christ. One exhilarating, ennobling, uncertain step at a time."

As I leafed through it, reading my underlines, I remembered how much I liked the book. I remembered how encouraging it was to me and how it touched a true place in my heart that deeply wants to shove fear aside and be close to Jesus no matter what the cost. His analogy of a dance is fitting as well for me. Ever since the days of high school and college dances were past, I have been timid about dancing. I took a Sunday School class at church which used the book The Artist's Way, whose purpose is to help artists (and anyone really) find or re-find their creativity. In several of the exercises readers are asked to list things they'd like to do if they were unafraid, or things that symbolize freedom and such things. Dancing seemed to show up a number of times on my lists.

Why is it that fear keeps me from the things I truly and deeply want? I think it's because those things do not come with a guarantee that they won't also perhaps involve some kind of suffering, pain, or discomfort. I hate that life is like that. There just is no guarantee. There is no fully safe place this side of heaven. I resisted swallowing that truth for a long time. I hid myself from it, trying to muddle through with my fears and pains and problems. It was as if God couldn't even help me because I put my head in the sand and refused to meet Him in reality. I seem to recall Jesus telling a woman at a well that those who worship God must worship Him in spirit and in truth.

I kept living with my head in the sand, though, not really addressing the issues. God would bring them up with regular faithfulness and I would argue with Him and complain to Him that I wanted MORE safety and MORE security than He offers while we're living this earthly life. Over the years, God, in His kindness and determination for me to have something more than fear in this life, kept challenging me to trust Him. Somewhere in those years, I saw this book by Ken Gire. I didn't read it for awhile after buying it but when I did, boy did it hit the spot.

Here are some lines from the first chapter that speak what I in no way can say better than the author:

"...the Christian life is about intimacy, not technique. The Lord of the dance doesn't want us worrying about our feet. He doesn't want us wondering about the steps ahead. He merely wants us to feel the music, fall into His arms, and follow His lead.


There are places He wants to take us on the dance floor, things He wants to show us, feelings He wants to share with us, words He wants to whisper in our ear. This is what the divine embrace is -- an invitation to a more intimate relationship with Christ, one exhilarating, ennobling, uncertain step at a time.


We can dance
Or we can sit it out.


If we dance, we may step on His toes. And He may step on ours. We may stumble and bump into other people. We may fall on our faces and make fools of ourselves. People may talk, they may avoid us, they may even ridicule us.


If you fear those things, you may want to sit it out. If you do, you won't have to worry. You'll be safe in your seat along the wall. You'll also miss the dance. More importantly, you'll miss the romance.


At some time or another, I have chosen to sit it out. Fear is a big reason. Fear of the attention it would bring -- perhaps the criticism. Fear of embarrassment and possible estrangement. Fear of not being in control of my life, my career, my future. Fear of being led to places that would be uncomfortable, even painful.


There are two things I have learned from the divine embrace.
- That perfect love really does cast out fear.
- And that I would rather dance poorly with Jesus than sit perfectly with anyone else."


I want to dance.
I want to accept His invitation to dance with Him.
And I want to let Him lead.