Relinquishing The Monster

There is a scene from C.S. Lewis' The Great Divorce I'm thinking of right now. The book depicts an imaginary bus ride to heaven where the travelers, hardened by years of self-consumed living and rejection of God, experience the extraordinary “realness” of heaven. They interact with and witness residents of this land of heaven. One scene contains the exchange between a heavenly being and a man who would like to stay but cannot without leaving behind his friend. His “friend” is a lizard-like creature on his shoulder. It whispers in his ear, influencing him mercilessly and growing larger and heavier on his shoulder the more the man attempts to resist him. The man doesn't realize that his familiar companion is no friend at all. He's grown so used to its presence that he greatly fears removing him from his shoulder, even in exchange for heaven itself. The fact remains that this gentleman cannot stay in heaven and keep his lizard. Its removal would mean its death. He has to relinquish his lizard, essentially giving his permission for it to be removed and killed. When he finally did so, the lizard shreiked at the touch of it's slayer. In agony it shriveled and died. It was painful for the man to watch. But then, before his eyes, it turned into an altogether different creature of such beauty the man was amazed. This new and beautiful creature did accompany him in his new heavenly residence.
Like the “lizard guy” in The Great Divorce, we have to voluntarily relinquish our monsters of unhealed fear, relinquisth them for removal. To change metaphors here, we have to voluntarily submit the infected appendage to our Doctor for lancing. But our lizard, our infection, is intangible and so much harder to grab hold of in order to relinquish and surrender over to the Healer. But God is good. He knows this. He knows the difficulty of the relinquishment we face. He knows our weakness and is mindful that we are but dust.  (Psalm 103:14) Very precious and highly valued “dust” to Him. He longs for us to give Him full access to our monstrous infection of unhealed fear. He longs for us to trust Him with any pain that accompanies the healing we so deeply long for. It is well worth it and I want it. How do I do it? It all boils down to TRUST again.

Lord help us to lay hold of our intangible infections and lay them out before Your surgeon's hand of healing. Help us to see what to surrender, even it's just a big ball of unclear fearfulness. Give us the courage to give You full access. Help us trust You with any pain that might come from facing things we've avoided for too long. You are the Perfect Healer. You are the Perfect Lover of our souls. We long for the freedom, peace, and rest You died to give us. We will choose to trust You with Your processes for clearing the way of our hearts to receive it.